i tried

went running today, then to yoga
to flush out the mental and physical toxins
of my usually overloaded work day.
i think my body was happy, but
my brain was still left a little anxiety-ridden
what with my list of 100+ to do's at work.

came back from my New York vacation on Apr. 30.
Me and the BF were away since Apr. 21.
We had the best time eating, site seeing, eating,
eating & spending quality time with friends and MOST ESPECIALLY
babysitting little miss Cameron.
we are so attached to this 5 month old angel.
we miss her everyday, and I swear, our extensive time with
her
left us reeling to have kids of our own...soon.

then, it was back to the chaos of work on 5/2.
all was well and i was refreshed until wednesday of that week hit.
shit...it hit me really hard.
...so hard that i started a crying fest in our staff meeting that day.

but ever since then, i have had this very grounded sense of
my current reality.
not sure where this 6th sense came from, but it makes
me feel like an adult.
I suppose my 32 years of experiencing life
is beginning to feel like it counts for something.

i'm definitely starting to see my potential be realized
in different ways, mainly in regaining a self confidence
that has been missing in quite some time.
i've realized that when i am doing what i love,
the best things come out of me.

i think i have also had hundreds of epiphanies & visions
of how to make things better.
i'm so happy to be inspired again.
thank god my last job didn't completely
suck the life out of me!

i owe it to myself to really write in depth about
my priceless experience at the center.
it has been so incredibly rich, even with the pockets
of drama, politics and heartache.

I keep thinking to myself
that even though my days are chock full of shit to do,
and even though this time is about struggle for everyone I work with,
this is simply life-
a different aspect of it,
but fundamentally the same thing.
and i just need to figure out how to maneuver through it
just like any other thing in my life.

will write more later. til next time