so i did it.
i finally sent in my cover letter and resume
to a job opening.
it's taken me a while...try 1 year...
but i suppose it is better late than never.

it feels good to finally have taken that step.
it's like that first hurdle before the flood
gates open.
I applied for a Program Assistant position
with this organization that provides
workshops, seminars and classes to further
the professional development of people working
in the non-profits.

i've been r eading this book that my friend told me
about: "how to find the work you love".
i did it to find some direction, some inspiration.
while reading it i began to realize that i pretty much
already knew what i wanted in my career.
for example, i think i've always known
that i really need to be in a place
that i believe in in order to wholeheartedly
invest myself.

my job right now could have been that way, but
there just is no inspiration for me to do better.
and it's more clear to me now that it is because
it is somebody else's show. somebody else must
always have control of the situation. someone
else's style is what matters most. there really
is no value in my ideas.

i just can't be in a place like this.

however, i suppose the reason why i have lasted
so long there is because it is cush - cush in the
sense that i don't really have to be creative,
i just have to DO the job.

i'm just happy that i finally took the second step
(i suppose the first one is wanting to get out of my situation).
For today i won't worry.
I'll be spending the day at Great America!

til next time.