11:59a

strange revelations
just finished reading my cousin, Chi's blog and I remembered that I didn't blog yesterday.
Anyhow, just like her, I had this sudden urge to go out and run when i woke
up at 6am yesterday.
and you know what? I went out and did it.

It was kinda wierd at first cause I'm not used to exercising that
early in the morning, but
because it was already light out, i felt safer and more comfortable.
I even had some time to stretch and shower afterwards.
Of course, I was about 10 minutes late for work
but it didn't really matter cause my boss wasn't in yesterday.

I thought I could pull off the same schedule today, but
my mind just wasn't having it.
I'm thinking of running during lunch time, though.
I just gotta wait til after I digest the Jamba juice I just inhaled.
It was the "chocolate mmo'd" flavor.
mmm...it hit the spot.

blessed
last night at the spa, I was blessed again with another
wonderful client.
she was definitely "good people", as my ex-co-workers and I would say.
She was super sweet and even accomodating of me!

Since there weren't anymore clients by 8p, I decided to go home.
I didn't really feel like fixing the linen closet again.
I swear, I think I'm the only one that does!
Anyhow, I just stayed in the staff room by myself
and gorged on my caesar salad and top ramen
while reading "US" magazine.

I know, I shouldn't subscribe to that stuff since
I just contribute to the paparazzi abuse that
celebrities are subjected to, but
I just love looking at the clothes...especially the evening
gowns that celebrities wear.
Well, maybe next time I'll make a more conscious effort
not to pick one up and bury my nose in it.

other revelations
so I bought another journal last night (this makes 3 total).
I decided that I needed one just to put my goals and dreams in.
I headed over to Barnes and Noble to get one.
I spent a good 20 minutes shopping for the right one...
I'm very particular: I need one that is just the right size with
spiral binding (I hate the book kind...unless it can open flat) and no lines on the pages.
I feel less constricted when I write on a completely
blank page.
Oh, and I also bought book 4 of Harry Potter.

Last night before I went to bed, I looked through my old
journals and transferred all of the goals I wrote in there
into my new one.
I guess the whole goal-setting thing is going to be a huge process for me.
I thought it might be something I could take care of in one day, but
I think this time around will be different.

I guess the reason for me putting all my goals in one place is
so that I can constantly look back at it to remind me
where my thought process has been.

In reading my old journals last night, I realized
that I had so much motivation and energy back when I wrote those entries.
I wasn't yet jaded or polluted by the politics of things...
Life seemed pretty endless and I felt I could accomplish anything.

I guess a part of me has lost some of that.
But today on my drive to work, I really began to reflect on
my current work situation.
And the bottom line is, I'm not growing.
Well, I am learning about how NOT to run an organization...I'll give my experience
that much credit.
However, I would rather learn the positive stuff...how to do things the RIGHT way.

And when I really look at what I do here at my admin job,
it's all elementary.
I've done it all before.
And that coupled with the shitty systems we have in place is
simply not worth investing in.

...once again, i've found confirmation in my need to get out of here
and find something more worthwhile where I am TRULY growing
AND
meeting community needs.

THERE. I wrote it. I no longer have any doubts - period.