it is the end of day 5 of my week back to work
since being sick all week last week.
all I could think about all morning was
me and the bf's trip to Monterey tomorrow.
I was super excited, and still am. It was definitely
hard to think about anything else at work.

I don't know why I'm all aglow about going this time around.
I know that i need the mental break from everything, but
I really have never been so excited to be able to drive
down the coast to see my favorite place, which I call "my heaven":
a beautiful stretch of the pacific coast dotted with
yellow wild flowers along a bluff overlooking the beach below.
I have never been so excited to walk the hiking trails
of this one park (i forgot the name) and climb over rocks
to get to several tide pools.
I've never been so excited for the opportunity to sit and
have a cup of coffee with my bf at this one little cafe
in Carmel while we chat and watch people pass by our window.
For some reason or other, i just can't wait to go.

As for work, I learned this week how to tame my overly
anxiety-ridden side of dealing with it.
I realized that I still need to figure out a way
to maintain my productivity without burning myself out.
I realized that i need to continuing looking at this experience
as a space for me to learn & grow in the areas
that I can learn & grow in, and to not take this for granted.
I realized that it will still take time for me to get a handle on things
and to get to a place where
I am truly happy with my experience.

For now, all I want to do is focus on my lovely
weekend away from it all.